Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Battle with my Impulses

Basically, I suck. I'm having a very hard time gaining control again, and I hate to admit that. The past few days have been an improvement from the weekend, but I'm still not quite there.

You see, on the weekend I was eating whatever whenever. It's just a really tough thing to get over and get back to what I've been doing. I'm cranky, depressed, moody, and overall just not a pleasure to deal with at the moment. I'm not taking things in stride, and I can't wait to get over it.

-I jogged for 10 minutes yesterday, and today didn't exercise at all

-Not really drinking water

-Eating too many calories

-Freaking out

Ok, so I'm having "self control issues", If someone hands me a slice of pizza, I'm going to eat it without thinking. This was my undoing several years ago. I don't want it to happen again. I'm not getting to the gym at my normal times, and this began last week. I was late repeatedly and coach Smith kept mentioning it to me. I don't have that fire at the moment and it's driving me nuts.

Something I've noticed is that I eat way too many calories for breakfast. By the time it's 10 AM I've had 1,000 calories which I think is far too many. Then, later on in the day I don't have any left and just eat. They need to be more spread out, and as much as I hate carrying food to school, I want to begin doing that again.

...help... :*(

3 comments:

MangyCat said...

Sending you a great big hug, Nat. *hugs* Hang in there, girl. It's probably hard to be at that in between stage where you are hovering around the dreaded 200 mark.

Try finding other avenues to release your sadness and frustration--maybe call up a friend for a walk or go see a movie (and get the small popcorn if you have to ;o).

I totally understand the eating when you're stressed/frustrated/upset thing. It's totally lame. I wish I had a better solution for you. Just don't let one setback period unravel everything you have worked so hard for.

You've come a long way; don't forget it. You have a lot to be proud of and 70+ pounds lost is nothing to sneeze at. You've done it, you've been doing it, and you CAN continue to do it!

Unknown said...

Ugh! I can so relate. I think after 3 months, I'm finally starting to get back at this. It sucks. I think getting back on program after going off for a bit is harder than getting started in the first place. I finally had to force myself to do what I had to for about two weeks with no excuses. I knew this is what I needed to do but I kept finding excuses to avoid it & giving in to laziness. Self-discipline, I believe, is not something we are born with, it is something we have to develope over time. It is like a muscle. Each time we choose discipline, we grow a little stronger in resisting temptation the next time. Resisting temptation gets easier every time we do it. Unfortunately, that one time we give in, it makes it that much harder to resist the next time.

I'm not sure any of this helps, it is just what I am having to learn & relearn everyday.

Sars said...

I am in the midst of this battle myself. I do not regret working and going to school, but it is definitely affecting my weight loss at the moment. :/